I am thankful for happiness and the people who love me.
I cook every year for people that dont really have family here. So what's on the menu today.
Turkey
Mashed potatoes
Yams
Cornbread
Stuffing
cranberry sauce
corn and green beans
One of my supposed friends were supposed to come for dinner but as usual she tripped out cause I got whipped cream instead of cool whip. I'm tempted to call her some kind of rude name but i'll bite my tongue. I'm done with her bs.
I'm having dinner with my roommate, I invited the neighbors and some other friends. It doesn't really matter who shows up. It's gunna be good food.
Tim spent the night with me Saturday. It was awesome. I got a text at like 1:30am and of course this one song was going through my head: "Cause if u callin at 2 in the morning it only means one thing, booty call boo boo booty call." Fuck my life lol.
Anyway. He came over we chilled and talked for a bit. He's good to talk to. Every man I've met born in '87 are pretty f'd in the head. Lets hope that's not the case with him. It was seriously awesome tho. He spent the night. He fell asleep with me in his arms. We cuddled, in the morning he pulled me in close. We got dressed which was pretty pointless, cause we just ended up undressed again lmao. Guess I looked sexy in that outfit haha. He looked sooo hot. He totally made me laugh telling me about how he asked his buddy if his outfit looked gay, and I was like dude u look hot. :)I invited him to thanksgiving dinner but I don't think he's gunna come. "Booty call boo boo booty call" LMAO who the fuck knows. He did get a little wound up when I walked to the bathroom in my panties. "Do u always walk around with no top on?" me "No, he just left for work" him "what if he forgot his keys?" I shrugged it off. Then I got a text from him saying "don't lock the door I forgot my keys" irony's a bitch and I laughed. If only he knew I tan topless on Holidays in Europe LMFAO.
Anyway Happy Canadian Thanksgiving everyone hahaha
Monday, October 11, 2010
Sunday, October 3, 2010
"He's out there ... He's just with all the wrong women"
Soooo I met this guy named Tim :P There is no competition between him and any of the other men who've been in my life. He blew them all out of the water. I don't even think Brad stands a chance against this one. Not like he plans on making a come back anyway haha. He's bigger built, kinda like Brads body type but more muscular. Probably because of the kind of work he does. Blonde hair blue eyes. He kinda reminds me of the dude from nip tuck Dylan Walsh. Ok really just the eyes are similar lol. I had a great time with him. He came over and we chilled in the afternoon. Watched part of a movie, drank some of my JD, we talked and such lol ... OMG Step Brothers is hilarious. I haven't even finished the movie yet but he's letting me borrow it which is sweet. He loved the back massage I gave him. I got one in return lol, like I'm gunna give out free massages (I'm the best). He said we have to do this again and I got the hugest hug. Loved it. I bet he could pick me up :P
It was just so easy with him. I've never had that. Simple, I wasn't nervous, he's good to talk to and the conversation just flowed. He has a sweet truck. My roommate thought he was cute too lol. Oh and he introduced himself to my roommate which I thought was polite and shook his hand. We have a lot of random things in common. I have a cork board in my room it's all my travels and adventures. He was looking at it. Saw the ticket to the stamps game I went to on Canada day and he said "that's weird I was sitting a row behind you at the game I went to yest"
If for some reason I don't see him again at least I got a dvd and a massage out of the deal haha. But as usual I hope I do. He's got some fun hobbies I wouldn't mind trying out.
My cat was just licking a green tea, tea bag. She's such a weirdo.
I'm saving for works Christmas party. I've heard it's wild. I want to wear a little red dress. I already have a date for it. Tho If I'm seeing someone I'll bring them with me instead. It's already been discussed.
The benefits of being the administrator I get to order shit. There is this blue hoodie I really wanted, we don't carry it anymore but I get to order it in for myself. Woot Woot! It's this beautiful blue color I love it. I'm already striving towards a new position that will be available in say a little under nine months lol. I've already talked to my boss about it and she said we can work towards it. Fingers crossed, It would be a wicked position.
Back to work tm. Don't think I can do Bodyflow or Pilates this week unless I talk to my Manager and ask her if I could do my last hour after the class. I'm working extra hours this week training someone, yay I'm important. I love my work uniform it's awesome.
"He's out there. He's just with all the wrong women" ps I love you. I think it's true.
It was just so easy with him. I've never had that. Simple, I wasn't nervous, he's good to talk to and the conversation just flowed. He has a sweet truck. My roommate thought he was cute too lol. Oh and he introduced himself to my roommate which I thought was polite and shook his hand. We have a lot of random things in common. I have a cork board in my room it's all my travels and adventures. He was looking at it. Saw the ticket to the stamps game I went to on Canada day and he said "that's weird I was sitting a row behind you at the game I went to yest"
If for some reason I don't see him again at least I got a dvd and a massage out of the deal haha. But as usual I hope I do. He's got some fun hobbies I wouldn't mind trying out.
My cat was just licking a green tea, tea bag. She's such a weirdo.
I'm saving for works Christmas party. I've heard it's wild. I want to wear a little red dress. I already have a date for it. Tho If I'm seeing someone I'll bring them with me instead. It's already been discussed.
The benefits of being the administrator I get to order shit. There is this blue hoodie I really wanted, we don't carry it anymore but I get to order it in for myself. Woot Woot! It's this beautiful blue color I love it. I'm already striving towards a new position that will be available in say a little under nine months lol. I've already talked to my boss about it and she said we can work towards it. Fingers crossed, It would be a wicked position.
Back to work tm. Don't think I can do Bodyflow or Pilates this week unless I talk to my Manager and ask her if I could do my last hour after the class. I'm working extra hours this week training someone, yay I'm important. I love my work uniform it's awesome.
"He's out there. He's just with all the wrong women" ps I love you. I think it's true.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Best Night Ever!!! :D
soo here's how my day went in a short version cause Im exhausted and need to go to sleep.
I got a present from one of my clients
My good friend did a surprise dinner (kinda) lol and we had Jerk chicken, where I then ran into my neighbors gf and had dinner with her as well.
I then rescheduled my date with Bryce (new guy) to see Shawn (guy I was dating in July).
I had the best night with Shawn. He likes my body u can tell. It's the first time anyone has ever showed me that kind of affection. He is such a sweetie. Holds my hand, kisses my neck (fav thing btw).
I won't even see Bryce if Shawn wants to hang out more often cause that's how I am, he's growing on me. I like him. Tho I wont make the same mistake twice.
Shawn wasn't who I was hoping to hear from but it turned out to be better then the person I was hoping 4.
We'll see how it goes with Shawn. Hopefully I get to see him again :D
I got a present from one of my clients
My good friend did a surprise dinner (kinda) lol and we had Jerk chicken, where I then ran into my neighbors gf and had dinner with her as well.
I then rescheduled my date with Bryce (new guy) to see Shawn (guy I was dating in July).
I had the best night with Shawn. He likes my body u can tell. It's the first time anyone has ever showed me that kind of affection. He is such a sweetie. Holds my hand, kisses my neck (fav thing btw).
I won't even see Bryce if Shawn wants to hang out more often cause that's how I am, he's growing on me. I like him. Tho I wont make the same mistake twice.
Shawn wasn't who I was hoping to hear from but it turned out to be better then the person I was hoping 4.
We'll see how it goes with Shawn. Hopefully I get to see him again :D
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
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Thursday, August 5, 2010
I'm in the business of making shit happen
When I put my mind to something, I get it done. I have a lot of determination and drive. Sometimes I loose myself, but I always find my way back.
It's been surreal being home. Nothings ever as I left it. My friends have grown up but we still manage to stick together. I think about moving back and then I really don't want to. I don't necessarily want to stay in Calgary. I hate the long freezing winters. I think about moving to Hawaii all the time. I've been everywhere and If i want to go there I will. I'm going to start saving just in case. However in the meantime I'm just gunna cruise through life and if something worth while comes about living in Calgary maybe I'll stay.
I've had the chance to spend time with my sister. It's been good seeing her.
Staying on track with my diet while I'm home not so successful. Fucking cheezits and wheat thins. Apparently my friends think I crave the weirdest snacks. I wanted fig newtons till I saw the calorie content. Lets face it more people have more then 2 cookies. Oh and what I've noticed here. The serving size here on items are bigger then in Canada. It's like they're telling people it's ok to have a bigger serving cause it's only this many calories.
Sometimes i'm a little over the top re my last post. I kinda bottle my feelings up rather then expressing them at the time, cause I like to avoid conflict. I'm still talking to my mom, I did tell her she was being childish and we didn't need to argue.
In regards to douche ... guess who messaged me?! Him, why? Whatever I'm not reading into anything to do with him anymore. The dumbass is unpredictable. I have this feeling he's this really big nerd. Doesn't bother me I like nerds. I do think about him every day. Every person I've kissed since him I've felt nothing, it makes me want to end things quick with everyone else. What's the point if there's no spark? I'll never settle for less than I deserve again.
My love life has been pretty interesting Men just come up to me now. Some blatantly express interest in sleeping with me. However if I'm not good enough to date you're not good enough to fuck, haha sry. Retards I swear. I'm not used to all this attention. Sometimes it creeps me out. I don't want to become the kind of girl who goes from guy to guy. Sex is meaningful and precious. The people you let close to you in that physical sense should mean something to you
Some of my friends wish they could be like me. It was weird when they said that. Like why would u want to be like me. I wish I saw what they saw in me. They wish they had my balls and confidence. You know I don't see it like that; that I have balls or confidence. A lot of times i'm not confident in myself. I see it as expressing myself, you only live once and I hate regretting things. If there is a chance of losing someone because I'm honest then I don't expect they would have lasted in my life anyway. Sometimes I let people get away with things to save an argument, usually they'll end up hearing exactly what I'm thinking. I'm a firm believer in honesty being the best policy tho u don't need to be cruel about it.
Well I'm gunna get back to hangin with my friends. I only have a few days left until I come back to my home which is currently Calgary. Looking forward to seeing my neighbors, those guys are my buddies I love drinking with them on the porch and just chillin watchin a movie. Looking forward to seeing my bestie and my good friends.
It's been surreal being home. Nothings ever as I left it. My friends have grown up but we still manage to stick together. I think about moving back and then I really don't want to. I don't necessarily want to stay in Calgary. I hate the long freezing winters. I think about moving to Hawaii all the time. I've been everywhere and If i want to go there I will. I'm going to start saving just in case. However in the meantime I'm just gunna cruise through life and if something worth while comes about living in Calgary maybe I'll stay.
I've had the chance to spend time with my sister. It's been good seeing her.
Staying on track with my diet while I'm home not so successful. Fucking cheezits and wheat thins. Apparently my friends think I crave the weirdest snacks. I wanted fig newtons till I saw the calorie content. Lets face it more people have more then 2 cookies. Oh and what I've noticed here. The serving size here on items are bigger then in Canada. It's like they're telling people it's ok to have a bigger serving cause it's only this many calories.
Sometimes i'm a little over the top re my last post. I kinda bottle my feelings up rather then expressing them at the time, cause I like to avoid conflict. I'm still talking to my mom, I did tell her she was being childish and we didn't need to argue.
In regards to douche ... guess who messaged me?! Him, why? Whatever I'm not reading into anything to do with him anymore. The dumbass is unpredictable. I have this feeling he's this really big nerd. Doesn't bother me I like nerds. I do think about him every day. Every person I've kissed since him I've felt nothing, it makes me want to end things quick with everyone else. What's the point if there's no spark? I'll never settle for less than I deserve again.
My love life has been pretty interesting Men just come up to me now. Some blatantly express interest in sleeping with me. However if I'm not good enough to date you're not good enough to fuck, haha sry. Retards I swear. I'm not used to all this attention. Sometimes it creeps me out. I don't want to become the kind of girl who goes from guy to guy. Sex is meaningful and precious. The people you let close to you in that physical sense should mean something to you
Some of my friends wish they could be like me. It was weird when they said that. Like why would u want to be like me. I wish I saw what they saw in me. They wish they had my balls and confidence. You know I don't see it like that; that I have balls or confidence. A lot of times i'm not confident in myself. I see it as expressing myself, you only live once and I hate regretting things. If there is a chance of losing someone because I'm honest then I don't expect they would have lasted in my life anyway. Sometimes I let people get away with things to save an argument, usually they'll end up hearing exactly what I'm thinking. I'm a firm believer in honesty being the best policy tho u don't need to be cruel about it.
Well I'm gunna get back to hangin with my friends. I only have a few days left until I come back to my home which is currently Calgary. Looking forward to seeing my neighbors, those guys are my buddies I love drinking with them on the porch and just chillin watchin a movie. Looking forward to seeing my bestie and my good friends.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Born To Walk Away ... Peace Out
In my 24 years of life I have had so much hurt. People walking all over me treating me like shit. I'm done with that. People may see it as me being a bitch but it's my life and I just want good people in my life. Anyone who brings me down I'm saying peace out. I don't need that shit.
A supposed friend of mine yesterday said I don't care about ur "little friends". Fuck you I don't give a shit about the handful of guys u have on the go either. You cause you're own problems. You're dramatic and rude and u bring nothing good to my life ... peace out.
I call my mom and she's like you're calling early you woke everyone up. What's up? Why the fuck would I want to talk to you after you said that to me. Sorry for bothering u mom and being an annoying inconvenience ... Honestly I forgot about the time difference and I said that and she carried on about that. I knew she was awake I just didn't think about the time difference and everyone else who's sleeping ... peace out mom.
The newbie is gone. No surprise ... If I don't walk away then they do ... peace out
My heart still hurts over douche, I miss him. I hate him for making me feel this hurt. I hate him for never giving me a chance. I hate him for the false promises. I'm not dumb. He may have had a slight inclination to see me again but that faded fast. I'm guessing when some other chick paid him some interest. Whatever, you have done nothing for me. The one time where u made me feel beautiful that's all you've done for me. Now over shadowed by the fact u don't want me cause I'm fat. Why do I still try. Cause I fell fast and hard for u that's why, as soon as I saw u I felt it ... you don't want me ... peace out.
To my ex husband ... I accepted you left me. I accepted it when u got a gf. I accept her because she makes u happy and she seems like a nice person. I accept the fact that you want to have a family with her but you never wanted one with me.I let you go because I wanted you to be happy, and I am so happy that you're happy. I don't miss you. Us splitting up was for the best. I'm happier now. I'm grateful for everything you've done for me I wish we could have stayed friends, but you just want to erase me from your life like I never existed ... peace out.
To everyone who has ever said something hurtful to me ... fuck you ... peace out!
Walking away is my specialty ... the amount of times I've moved and had to leave people behind ... I was born to walk away.
A supposed friend of mine yesterday said I don't care about ur "little friends". Fuck you I don't give a shit about the handful of guys u have on the go either. You cause you're own problems. You're dramatic and rude and u bring nothing good to my life ... peace out.
I call my mom and she's like you're calling early you woke everyone up. What's up? Why the fuck would I want to talk to you after you said that to me. Sorry for bothering u mom and being an annoying inconvenience ... Honestly I forgot about the time difference and I said that and she carried on about that. I knew she was awake I just didn't think about the time difference and everyone else who's sleeping ... peace out mom.
The newbie is gone. No surprise ... If I don't walk away then they do ... peace out
My heart still hurts over douche, I miss him. I hate him for making me feel this hurt. I hate him for never giving me a chance. I hate him for the false promises. I'm not dumb. He may have had a slight inclination to see me again but that faded fast. I'm guessing when some other chick paid him some interest. Whatever, you have done nothing for me. The one time where u made me feel beautiful that's all you've done for me. Now over shadowed by the fact u don't want me cause I'm fat. Why do I still try. Cause I fell fast and hard for u that's why, as soon as I saw u I felt it ... you don't want me ... peace out.
To my ex husband ... I accepted you left me. I accepted it when u got a gf. I accept her because she makes u happy and she seems like a nice person. I accept the fact that you want to have a family with her but you never wanted one with me.I let you go because I wanted you to be happy, and I am so happy that you're happy. I don't miss you. Us splitting up was for the best. I'm happier now. I'm grateful for everything you've done for me I wish we could have stayed friends, but you just want to erase me from your life like I never existed ... peace out.
To everyone who has ever said something hurtful to me ... fuck you ... peace out!
Walking away is my specialty ... the amount of times I've moved and had to leave people behind ... I was born to walk away.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Not holding back
Sooo fuck i'm in a bad mood.
I call my mom who is too self involved right now to listen to anyone elses issues. Well except when she's at work cause obv it's her job to listen to other peoples problems. They were supposed to be coming to visit me on Monday but they aren't now cause my sisters passport is expired. GAY!!!!
Douche bag I swear to god. So the other week he randomly texts me to bother me at night just to tell me "I like skinny girls". Fuck you ass hole you're full of shit. You may prefer smaller girls but you sure have had plus size gf's in the past and u shouldn't sleep with people if ur not interested in them. Anyhow. He texts me again at like 11:30 on sat tripping out cause he thought I had a bf. Then tells me that he's a relationship kinda guy and that he'll come out next time. The next morning of course he was like I was drunk I don't want anything from you. I'm sorry ok. NO NOT OK!!!! I told him so too :). Just how I felt but I'm a good enough person to tell him that I sincerely hopes he has a good life. Fuck he's dumb. Oh and he deletes me from FB but keeps me on MSN. What a tool!!! I wont delete him and yah I know that makes me dumb too. I have no intentions of talking to him, if he wants to talk to me he knows where I'm at. I take it he doesn't, whatever like my brother said there are billions of men out there and not one are the same and on that note ...
So I went out with this guy on Saturday cause I fig douche is a douche and it's time to date again. I like the newbie. He's sweet. We got some coffee/tea went for a walk in the park. Made out at two benches and a tree which he has now renamed the makeout bench. We got together again on sun. Watched a movie at his place ... lol. Then we went out Tue. I was gunna cook for him but those plans got kinda messed up. We went to the cinema to see eclipse. I was going to the machine to pay and he called me back and had like two paid ticket things. It was so sweet. Then in the movie he put his arm around me and held my hand. I went back to his place for a bit after. I text him yest to see if he still wanted to go to the zoo... I got nothin. Trying not to stress it. He could be busy. Time will tell. If not he was a nice guy and I had a good time. It was nice to be treated right for once. I do hope i hear from him tho :) he seems like a good guy genuinely and I wouldn't mind if he sticks around for a while.
I got the job at the gym. Yay!!! I start mon. I get a free membership too. Not brilliant money but hey ho i didn't take the job for the money, I took it to change my life.
I'm just frustrated. Tho happy that I got a job, went on 3 nice dates with a sweetheart who's adorable. I have an awesome roommate tho he's messy lol, messier then me. Cool neighbors who like to kick it, and good friends. I leave in 18 days for Cali and I can't wait to get out of Calgary for a bit. Life is attempting to treat me well and all I have to say is Thank you life.
Oh the bet ... fuck let's not discuss that till i hit the 230's.
I call my mom who is too self involved right now to listen to anyone elses issues. Well except when she's at work cause obv it's her job to listen to other peoples problems. They were supposed to be coming to visit me on Monday but they aren't now cause my sisters passport is expired. GAY!!!!
Douche bag I swear to god. So the other week he randomly texts me to bother me at night just to tell me "I like skinny girls". Fuck you ass hole you're full of shit. You may prefer smaller girls but you sure have had plus size gf's in the past and u shouldn't sleep with people if ur not interested in them. Anyhow. He texts me again at like 11:30 on sat tripping out cause he thought I had a bf. Then tells me that he's a relationship kinda guy and that he'll come out next time. The next morning of course he was like I was drunk I don't want anything from you. I'm sorry ok. NO NOT OK!!!! I told him so too :). Just how I felt but I'm a good enough person to tell him that I sincerely hopes he has a good life. Fuck he's dumb. Oh and he deletes me from FB but keeps me on MSN. What a tool!!! I wont delete him and yah I know that makes me dumb too. I have no intentions of talking to him, if he wants to talk to me he knows where I'm at. I take it he doesn't, whatever like my brother said there are billions of men out there and not one are the same and on that note ...
So I went out with this guy on Saturday cause I fig douche is a douche and it's time to date again. I like the newbie. He's sweet. We got some coffee/tea went for a walk in the park. Made out at two benches and a tree which he has now renamed the makeout bench. We got together again on sun. Watched a movie at his place ... lol. Then we went out Tue. I was gunna cook for him but those plans got kinda messed up. We went to the cinema to see eclipse. I was going to the machine to pay and he called me back and had like two paid ticket things. It was so sweet. Then in the movie he put his arm around me and held my hand. I went back to his place for a bit after. I text him yest to see if he still wanted to go to the zoo... I got nothin. Trying not to stress it. He could be busy. Time will tell. If not he was a nice guy and I had a good time. It was nice to be treated right for once. I do hope i hear from him tho :) he seems like a good guy genuinely and I wouldn't mind if he sticks around for a while.
I got the job at the gym. Yay!!! I start mon. I get a free membership too. Not brilliant money but hey ho i didn't take the job for the money, I took it to change my life.
I'm just frustrated. Tho happy that I got a job, went on 3 nice dates with a sweetheart who's adorable. I have an awesome roommate tho he's messy lol, messier then me. Cool neighbors who like to kick it, and good friends. I leave in 18 days for Cali and I can't wait to get out of Calgary for a bit. Life is attempting to treat me well and all I have to say is Thank you life.
Oh the bet ... fuck let's not discuss that till i hit the 230's.
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